#14

I'm already at the edge.. of the cliff

When you decided to echo back my name 

But now I believe

There's nothing much left to say

So I decided to leave

My Seafarer 🛳

Do you still remember how loser we were back then in SAHUT? Kita duduk belakang masa Chemistry Camp dgn Cikgu Salah, kita sembang "aku lepas habis SPM ni aku nak keja ngn ayah kau je Lin, kau jadi vice CEO aku jadi secretary okay dah", "tak, aku rasa baik kita jadi model tapi kena kurus dulu lah" because we were that LOSERS 😂 😂 😂 

Then lepas SPM, aku ikut kau pegi KL & Terengganu (10 hari) utk teman kau workout & belajar swimming sb kau SECRETLY nak masuk ALAM. Yes secretly guys.. no kidding. Padahal she was supposed to study law in UiTM. & banyak sangat memori weh, part yg paling best masa nak pegi jalan2 area KL, aku... "Lin Mijaa takde duit laa", "Takpe, kita bawak bekal makanan" *bersungguh* tup tup lepak & makan bekal kat KL sentral JEEE sb noob plus loser gila kejar bas rapid malam2 sb nak save duit. 

I post this because you matter to me. You've changed the way I see some things in life. The most humblest friend I've ever known is you. The most selfless friend is also you. You'd go miles for your loved ones (which is including me ok 😌) & that's why I love you!❤️❤️❤️ Congratulation for graduating from ALAM school Nazlin!!! 💐🎉✨ Now you're officially a seafarer, but please never say 'Goodbye' to me 🛳👋🏻☹️ #appreciationpost

#13

On instagram, I dm-ed my little (not so little) sister, Dalili.

"Adik.. kakak sedih.."

*immediately she calls me from Maktab*

"Kenapa sedih? Sebab tu lagi ke?"

"............"

"Dah la.. jangan sedih sedih lagi, jangan fikirkan sangat.."

"Tapi...."

"Ingat Mama Abah.. Kakak nak happykan Mama Abah kan? 

Adik kalau sempat, sempat.. tapi Mama Abah dah meningkat usia... 

you know what I mean right?"

"Ye.. tahu.."

"Semua benda yang berlaku ni ada hikmahnya.. bersangka baik dengan Allah okay?"

"Ya.. tapi........."

"Yelah.. tahu tu. Kakak dengan dia dah berapa lama?"

"Setahun, empat bulan"

"Kakak dengan Mama Abah dah berapa lama?"

"..................."

And then, I cried myself to sleep. thinking what I ain't. Every single day.

Until now. It hurts, it hurts. I hope this pain will get me numb,

until it doesn't hurt me anymore.

#12

Isn’t it strange that we talk least 
about the things we think about most?

#11

Depression isn't
always at 3am,
sometimes it hits you
at 3pm when you're
with your friends and
you're half way
through a laugh and
suddenly stop.